Even on Thanksgiving Day of what has been the most challenging year for me, I am thankful.
I am thankful for the chance to spend 10 months with Jackson after his cancer diagnosis. I am still so sad without him but I still believe his heart is with me and there has not been a day that has gone by when I haven't thought about our happy times together...running trails, swimming, fetching tennis balls...I am thankful for every moment I ever had with that dog for 13 years.
This was a day I knew would eventually come but no matter how ready I thought I would be, I wasn't. Today, I lost my best friend, my first love, my baby boy. For his 13th birthday I wanted to give him a small gathering of friends and toys, but that is not what he wanted. He wanted peace. He was tired of fighting and told me it was time. His well being has always been #1 in my mind so I listened to him. He fell asleep in my arms this morning while we both laid on the ground, with him covered in warm blankets. I know it's how he wanted it but my heart is broken.
I had to actually check back through my blog to remember the last time I did an endurance mountain bike race. It was Pierre's Hole 100 in August of 2011! Wow. I guess I know where the time has gone.....grad school and learning how to "tri". It's funny to me that at one point in my life racing 50 miles was too short. Two weeks ago I signed up to race a 50 mile mountain bike race in TN with ZERO mountain bike rides over 30 miles since 2011.
6 months. 6 months! I finally raced my mountain bike. I've been riding a decent amount but haven't had the confidence that I could actually *race* my bike again until recently. I've been on the trails more and been riding my new Canyon CF 29er hardtail. It rides like no bike I've ever had and I feel great on it. My upper body strength is still lacking a bit but my handling skills are coming back.